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Click on a link below to view the sounds.
Apu
"Hey there Homer, how's
it hanging?" (34 KB)
"I am Apu
Nahasapemapetilon" (21 KB)
"Thank you for coming,
I'll see you in hell" (29 KB)
"Silly customer, you
cannot hurt a twinky" (35 KB)
"Oh my God, this boy
is having an out of body experience..." (54 KB)
"Put it down, or I'll
blow your heads off" (21 KB)
"...Perhaps a crazy
motorized wiggle pen... heh, look at, the craziness" (30 KB)
"The Dream Police, they
live inside of my bed..." (35 KB)
"Oooh a head bag! Those are
chock full of... heady goodness" (17 KB)
"It may not be glamorous,
but it's good honest work..." (30 KB)
"Hello, i am not
interested in buying your house, but I would like..." (175 KB)
"My ceiling mirrors
and video cameras sometimes see more..." (152 KB)
"Please come again"
(9 KB)
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Barney
Barney doing his ever popular
belch (6 KB)
"I am the very model of a
modern major general..." (10 KB)
"Hey Homer, I'm worried
about the beer supply..." (173 KB)
The Plow King commercial (70
KB)
"Whoa! Someone smells stinky!
Oh, it's me" (72 KB)
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Bart
"What a day, eh Milhouse?
The sun is out, birds are singin', bees..." (76 Kb)
"What a load of crappy crap
crap" (11 Kb)
"It's Craptacular"
(15 Kb)
"Damn T.V. You've ruined my
imagination, just like you've ruined..." (76 Kb)
"I'm looking for a friend
of mine, last name Jass, first name Hugh" (29 KB)
"Ay Carumba!" (10
KB)
"Yeah, hello. Is
mike there? Last name Rotch." (30 KB)
"How would I go about
creating a half man, half monkey creature?" (19 KB)
"I'm Homer Simpson, and I'd
like to order an Itchy and Scratchy cell" (162 KB)
"Got your nose. Got
your wallet!" (6 KB)
"Oh my God! The dead
have risen and they're voting Republican!" (15 Kb)
"Behold the horrors of the
Slanty Shanty!" (35 KB)
"The burglar even
took my stamp collection." "YOu had a stamp..." (72 KB)
"Dear God, we paid for all
this stuff ourselves so thanks for nothin'." (39 KB)
"Wow! The Tooth Chipper!"
(114 KB)
"I think it's ironic that
dad's butt prevented the release of toxic gas" (69 KB)
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Bee Guy
"Ay! Es Homer Simpson!"
(56 KB)
Back to top
Superintendant
Chalmers
"...Yeah, Take it outside
godboy" (21 Kb)
"The rod up that man's butt
must have a rod up it's butt!" (39 Kb)
Back to top
Chief Wiggum
"Uh, no you got the wrong
number... this is 912" (29 KB)
"Do not be alarmed!
Continue Swimming naked" (38 KB)
"One day honest citizens
are gonna stand up to you crooked cops!" (20 KB)
"Isn't that cute, a baby
driving a car... and there's a dog driving a bus" (78 Kb)
"Mrs. Simpson, your husband was
found DOA" (279 Kb)
"You cable TV is
experiencing technical dificulties..." (206 KB)
"That car thief can't
hold his breath forever" (62 KB)
"get one of those
inflatable women... but make sure it's a woman"(15 KB)
"I'm jamming... jamming! And
I hope you like jamming too" (708 KB)
"Well, I couldn't possibly solve
this mystery, can you?..." (60 KB)
"Hey, I'm the chief here.
Bake him away toys." (164 KB)
"Well at McDonalds you can
buy a Krusty Burger with cheese..." (178 KB)
"Well, well, Mr. No bribe.
Just sit down..." (103 KB)
"OK folks, nothing to see
here... OH MY GOD A HORRIBLE PLANE CRASH!" (28 KB)
"Where Is Sideshow Bob and
that guy who eats people..." (321 KB)
"I'm afraid there's no law
against mailing threatening letters" (147 KB)
"You're under arrest
for attempted murder" "D'oh!" "Yeah that's..." (84 KB)
"Is that normal?"
"Yeah, he's just playing Wiggle Puppy..." (18 KB)
"Shut your word hole!"
(3 KB)
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Cletus
"I could call my ma
from up here... HEY MA! GET OFF THE DANG ROOF!" (109 KB)
"Hey kids! We're eatin'
dinner tonight!" (280 KB)
"Some Folk'll never eat a
skunk, but then again some folk'll..." (152 KB)
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Dr. Hibbert
"Excuse me sir, do you like
to laugh?" (119 KB)
"Anything I give you would
only be a placebo..." (36 KB)
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Dr. Nick Riviera
"HI EVERBODY!" (14
KB)
"Oopsy, heh, maybe if I
fiddle with these knobs" (10 KB)
"These gloves came free
with my toilet brush" (7 KB)
"Hi frozen body!"
(19 KB)
"The knee bones connected
to the something. The something..." (126 KB)
"Oh dear, I see no signs
of life" (8 KB)
"Holy smokes! You need
booze!" (71 KB)
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Frank Grimes
"I... I live in a
single room above a bowling alley and below..." (64 KB)
Back to top
Grampa Simpson
"I'm going where the
action is!" (6 Kb)
"Coma? Why I go in and out
of comas all the... French Toast please" (20 KB)
"Death stalks you at every
turn... AHHHH! DEATH!" (67 KB)
"I had sex!" (30
KB)
"Hey!" (7 KB)
"I'M OLD... GIMME GIMME
GIMME!" (4 kb)
"I'll Be back in a
jiffy" (4 Kb)
"MATLOCK!!" (21
KB)
"I used to be with it, but
then they changed what it was..." (28 KB)
"Grampa, are you
sitting on the pie?" "I Sure hope so" (20 KB)
"Oh bitch bitch
bitch!" (7 KB)
"I can feel death's
clammy hand on my shoulder..." (16 KB)
"Didn't you wonder why you
were getting checks for doing nothing?" (16 KB)
"My story begins in the
year ninteen dickety two..." (136 KB)
"Hey the dog's
dead..." (67 Kb)
"This elevator only
goes to the basement..." (17 KB)
"The Good Lord lets us
grow old for a reason..." (18 KB)
"Like the time I caught
the ferry over to Shelbyville..." (102 KB)
"well, kiss me right here. It's
the only part that still has feeling" (25 KB)
"Grampa, Matlock's not
real..." (117 KB)
"I'll be deep in the cold
cold ground before I recognize Missouri" (23 KB)
"My car gets forty rods
to the hog's head, and that's the way I likes it!" (66 KB)
"I'm going to the
outhouse" "We don't have an outhouse..."(12KB)
"My Homer is not a
Communist..." (85 KB)
"I was spanked by
Grover Cleveland on two non-consecutive..."(21KB)
"I'm an Elk, a Mason, A
Communist..." (56 KB)
"I feel all funny... I'm in
love! No, wait, it's a stroke" (41 KB)
"Dear Mr. President,
there are too many states now adays..." (99 KB)
"How'd you take off your
underwear without taking off your pants?" (122 KB)
"Are we there yet? Are we
There yet? Where are we going?" (15 KB)
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Hans Moleman
"Drinking has ruined my
life. I'm 31 years old!" (76 KB)
"You took four minutes of
my life and I want them back!" (18 KB)
"Hello, this is moleman
in the morning. Good Mole man to you" (174 KB)
"Coat, biscuits, chicken,
yellow, mailman..." (120 KB)
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Homer
"...Your the biggest man in
the world now, and your covered in gold..." (35 KB)
"Aw, 20 dollars, I wanted a
peanut..." (111 KB)
"I have to scratch
myself in two places at once" (116 KB)
"List your three favorite
books..." (34 KB)
"I found a dollar while
I was waiting for the bus..." (166 KB)
"a little death
anxiety is normal, you will go through 5 stages..." (244 KB)
"Give me 700 Krusty
Burgers!" (34 KB)
"Marge it'll cost 8500
hundred dollars..." (19 KB)
"AHHHH!" (6 KB)
"Ahhhh!
Boogieman!" (25 KB)
"Here's the angel, see the
angel. It's my angel, no one else's..." (69 KB)
"Can we get rid of this
Ayatollah T-shirt? Kuhmehni died years..." (232 KB)
"What's the point of going
out, were only gonna wind up back here" (8 KB)
"Aw, there's only one can
of beer left and it's Bart's" (7 KB)
"Hey! A new weather
station! I'll bash it good!" (45 KB)
"...Batman?" "No,
he's a scientist" "Batman's a scientist..." (81 KB)
"Let the bears pay the bear
tax, I pay the Homer Tax" (14 KB)
"The bee bit my bottom, now my
bottom's big!" (31 KB)
"You're over stimulated,
let's get some beer in you..." (66 KB)
"Oh Lisa, you and
your stories, Bart is a vampire, beer kills brain cells" (30 KB)
"Well I won the belching
contest at work. *Belch*" (182 KB)
"Well you kinda
went bezerk when he couldn't remember your..." (69 KB)
"That Ayatollah
thinks he's better than America! Is he right?" (75 KB)
"You're Darrel
Strawberry" "Yes" "You play right field" "Yes"..."
(54 KB)
"...screw up like
the Beatles and say you were bigger than jesus?..." (70 KB)
"I'm being indighted for
fraud in Australia" "That's no reason..." (64 KB)
"What's goin' on? Why am I on a
Japanese box? Whaja... whajalook..." (38 KB)
"There's you giraffe little
girl" "I'm a Boy" "That's the spirit" (27 kb)
"Alright brain, you don't
like me and I don't like you..." (21 KB)
"Shut up brain, or I'll
stab you with a Q-Tip!" (5 KB)
"...Somethin' stupid
like Bart would say. Bukka bukka, or wooza wuzza" (75 KB)
"Baby on board something
something Burt Ward. This thing writes..." (68 KB)
"I've never seen a man
so desperate..." (28 Kb)
"... Marge anyone can miss
Canada, all tucked away down there." (74 Kb)
"Can't talk...
Robbed... Go hell." (35 Kb)
"Oh fudge, that's broken.
Fiddle-dee-dee, that will require..." (356 KB)
"...Haven't
you learned anything from that guy who gives sermons..." (80 KB)
"I'm going to the back seat
of my car, and I wont be back for..." (31 KB)
"Bart son, you wanna play
catch? "No" "When a boy doesn't wanna..." (46 KB)
"..Watch the Conan
O'Brian Show, you'll see. "Alright, but after Leno.." (91 KB)
"BART YOU
WANNA SEE MY NEW CHAINSAW AND HOCKEY MASK!?!?" "AHHH!" (79 KB)
"I am the champion! I am
the champion!" (39 KB)
"Dad are you
listening to me?" "shh. Lisa, The dog is barking." (89 KB)
"..There it is Homer, the
cleverest thing you'll ever say and nobody.." (99 KB)
"Use an open faced
club, the sandwedge" (19 KB)
"You can't go wrong
with cocktail weenies!" (6 KB)
"Here are the
responses from the colleges you applied to" (28 KB)
"Then I have a backup
plan..." (196 KB)
"...Don't let that pushy
little weenie tell you what to do" (40 KB)
"In gratitude I
present you this offering of cookies and milk" (27 KB)
"Well Pa, I cut myself on the
screeen door ageen" "Why you..." (17 KB)
"Why don't those stupid
idiots let me in their crappy club for jerks." (34 KB)
"She'll go 300 hectars
on a single tank of kerosene" "What country..." (41 KB)
"Now, what do you have to
wash that awful taste out of my mouth?" (76 KB)
"The Chinese use the
same word for crisis as opportunity" (16 KB)
"I'm living in a cuckoo
clock!" (15 KB)
"You like parties
huh? Well I just remembered they're having a big..." (58 KB)
"Don't let Krusty's death get
you down boy. People die all the time" (246 KB)
"Homer thats
dishwashing liquid!" (15 KB)
"The doll's trying to kill
me and the toaster's been laughing at me!" (26 KB)
"D'OH!" (11 KB)
"D'oh!" "A
deer!" "A female deer!" (40 KB)
"Doheth!" (7 KB)
"Sorry, but this is a
highly sophistamicated dowhacky" (84 KB)
"I'm puttin' speed holes in my
car. Makes it go faster." "Is that sO?" (130 KB)
"Duh" (5 KB)
"There there. Shut up
boy. We'll just get you a new dog" (665 KB)
"And how is
"education" supposed to make me feel smarter?" (87 KB)
"Scully you're cut. Brooks,
Groening, Simon, you're all cut..." (232 KB)
"Euh" (7 KB)
"I am evil Homer, I am evil
Homer..." (87 KB)
"And you can have it all for
just 500 dollars" "500 dollars!..." (100 KB)
"My first day of
college. I wish my father were alive to see this" (79 KB)
"Hey moe, wanna come
with me and Wally to the Superbowl?..." (251 KB)
"The fingers you have
use to dial, are too fat" (31 KB)
"My house is on fire!
Woohoo! Insurance to the rescue!" (21 KB)
"Musn't crush, musn't kill,
made it!" (187 KB)
"Simpson, Homer Simpson,
he's the greatest guy in history..." (267 KB)
"You couldn't fool your mother
on the foolingest day of your life..." (62 KB)
"Food goes in
here" "It sure does" (40 KB)
"Is there any frontal
nudity?" (39 KB)
"Homer no function beer
well without" (16 KB)
"...Hey a program from that
guys funeral." "You mean Frank Grimes?..." (95 KB)
"My gastronomic rapacity knows
no satiety" (11 KB)
"Homer, Bill Gates is
here" (89 KB)
"I gave my love a
chicken, it had no bone" (97 KB)
"But I used to Rock and
roll all night and party every day..." (24 KB)
"Who is it?"
"Goons" "Who?" "Hired goons" (56 KB)
"Let's go home" "We
are home" "That was fast" (14 KB)
"Excuse me. Are you a
student at this school?" "I think it's..." (81 KB)
"Gym? What's a gym? oh! A
gym." (84 KB)
"Barney's movie had heart,
but Football in the Groin had a..." (56 KB)
"If you don't like your
job, you don't strike..." (21 KB)
"I wanted an electric
football game more than anything..." (29 KB)
"I think I hate Homer
Simpson." "AH! Marge, I think I hate Ted Koppel..." (137 KB)
"Hee hee hee, he hee hee hee
hee" (23 KB)
"She's a heffer, plain and
simple!" (24 KB)
"Help me!" (9 KB)
"We're here, we're
queer, we don't want anymore bears!" (36 KB)
"Hey big spender, dig
this blender! Rainbow suspenders!" (184 KB)
"Hi kids, I love (tape
speeds up)" "AHHH!!" (54 KB)
"...I got you another
instrument." "What this jug?" (63 KB)
"Do you want to change your
name to Homer Junior? The kids can..." (46 KB)
"da da da da da, hey! da da
da da! da da da da da, Hey!" (56 KB)
"19" "Hit
me" "20" "Hit me" "21" "Hit me"
"22" "doh!" (16 KB)
"You don't see any
Homer is a dope T-shirts, do you?" "We sold those..." (65 KB)
Homer's crazy laugh (3 KB)
"The only danger is if
they send us to that horrible Planet of the Apes"(49 KB)
"Something was said, not
good... what was it..." (26 KB)
"I don't think a healthy
man can make that kind of smell" (10 KB)
"When I was 17, I drank
some very good beer..." (198 KB)
"I've got the prescription
for you, another hot beef injection!" (47 KB)
"...I love a cold beer
on a hot Christmas morning" (11 KB)
"And I wont rest untill I've
gotten a hot dog" (36 KB)
"...It seems that the cat
has been caught by the very person who..." (100 KB)
"...I love you too
Pepsi." "Pepe" "Pepe" (51 KB)
"Hello chief, let's talk,
why not?" "Hello? Why am I Mr. Sparkle?..." (55 KB)
"Ahh! I'm stuck! Help
me!" "He's done for!" "Let's get outta here!" (69 KB)
"Get outta here
Homer" "Homer? Who is homer? I am Guy Incognito." (30 KB)
"Stealing, stealing,
stealing a car for Moe" (79 KB)
"It looks like
ketchup, it tastes like ketchup, but brother, it ain't..." (12 KB)
"Aw, it's a boy, and what a
boy!" (83 KB)
"Huh! It's Rainin'
Men?" "Yeah not no more it ain't!" (7 KB)
"Outta my way,
jerkass!" (16 KB)
"Moe I need your advice,
see I got this friend named Joey Jo Jo..." (291 KB)
"Take this object, but
beware, it comes with a terrible curse" (227 KB)
"I wont sleep in the same bed
with a woman who thinks I'm lazy..." (11 KB)
"Ahh, I love these lazy
Saturdays" "It's Wednesday Homer" (62 KB)
"The forecast calls for a
75% chance of hilarity" "I like those odds!" (59 KB)
"...I'll have to quit
drinking" "Yay!" "Shut up liver!..." (90 KB)
"Me lose brain? Uh
oh." (286 KB)
"If you really want
something in this life, you have to work for it..." (32 KB)
"What if I told you,
you could lose weight without dieting..." (19 KB)
"Mmm, 64 slices of American
cheese" (49 KB)
"Lousy manipulative
dog" (18 KB)
"Marge, you being a cop
makes you the man..." (27 KB)
"I'm gonna make it
after all!" (73 KB)
"Mmm, barbeque"
(40 KB)
"Mmm, beer" (26 KB)
"Mmm, beernuts"
(18 KB)
"mmm, burger" (21
KB)
"Mmm, chicken" (25
KB)
"Mmm, chocolate"
(30 KB)
"You busted up that brack
house pretty bad mcGarnicle. Did you..." (111 KB)
"Sweet merciful crap!"
(14 KB)
"Mmm, crumbled up cookie
things" (38 KB)
"Mmm, donuts" (30
KB)
"Meow Meow Meow Meow Meow
Meow Meow" (11 KB)
"Marge, where's that
metal dealie... you use to dig... food" (34 KB)
"mmm, forbidden donut"
(34 KB)
"Mmm, unprocessed
fishsticks" (40 KB)
"Seatbelt twisted, minus one
point" "Nagging the driver, minus ten..." (31 KB)
"I don't have anything to
offer unless you're a minority..." (175 KB)
"Mmm, organized crime"
(9 KB)
"Mmm, invisible
cola" (7 KB)
"mmm" (10 KB)
"Mmm, Mediciny"
(6 KB)
"This model caR represents
my car, and this olive is you" "Mmm, me" (83 KB)
"Mmm,
sacrilicious" (39 KB)
"Mmm, urinal
fresh" (7 KB)
"Moe, Moe, Moe..."
(68 KB)
"CAll Mr. Plow, that's my
name, that name again is Mr. Plow" (14 KB)
"Uh, hello? Why am I Mr.
Sparkle?" "You like Mr. Sparkle?" (305 KB)
"Mmm, slanty" (7
KB)
"When you think about
it, Mud is nothin' but wet dirt" (34 KB)
"Must kill Moe...
Wheee! ... Must kill Moe... Wheee!" (94 KB)
"My boy's a box! Damn
you! ... A box!!" (63 KB)
"Why is Bart
getting a present and I'm getting chewed out?" (55 KB)
"Nacho nacho man! I want to
be, a nacho man!" (62 KB)
"Homer, are you planning to
hit Ned Flanders with that pipe?" (52 KB)
"Dad, you killed the
zombie Flanders!" (27 KB)
"I'm thinking of a number
between one and fifty..." (17 KB)
"All my life I've been an
obese man trapped inside a fat man's body" (9 KB)
"...they said the
same thing about Urkel, an... That little snot, I'd..." (97 KB)
"Old people don't need
companionship..." (24 KB)
"Ooh, fuzzy" (18
KB)
"Ovulate, damn you,
ovulate!" (64 KB)
Homer relieving himself (110
KB)
"What am I supposed to
do?" "Pick up bart, pick up Bart" "Pick a bar?" (72 KB)
"Don't worry about Homer J.
I've got a plan" (21 KB)
"Kids, I'm not gonna die,
that only happens to bad people" (23 KB)
"Ahhh! They're dogs, and
they're playing poker!" (103 KB)
"...I kicked a
giant mouse in the butt! Do I have to draw you a..." (84 KB)
"Don't tell him you were
at a bar, but what else is open at night?" (48 KB)
"I probably shouldn't
have eaten that powdered gravy I found in..." (60 KB)
"That dog has a puffy
tail!" (95 KB)
"If I could just say
a few words... I'd be a better public speaker." (66 KB)
"This has purple stuff
inside, purple is a fruit" (12 KB)
"The sum of the
square roots of any two sides of an isosceles..." (76 KB)
"Did you wreck the
car?" "No" "Did you raise the dead?" (20 KB)
"What religion are
you?" (19 KB)
"Oh Lord, protect this
rocket house and all who dwell within..." (36 KB)
"Nobody ruins my
family vacation but me!... And maybe the boy!" (54 KB)
"Hey, if you don't like it go
to Russia" (6 KB)
"God? If you really are
God, you'll get me two tickets to..." (311 KB)
"Marge, I'd like to be
alone with the sandwich for a moment" (13 KB)
"this is never easy to
say, I'm gonna have to saw your arms off" (148 KB)
"Sax-a-ma-phone...
Sax-a-ma-phone" (11 KB)
"Selma my dear, how are
ya? Uh huh, listen shut up for a second" (46 KB)
"...Scooby Doo can doo
doo, but Jimmy Carter is smarter." (74 KB)
"Marge and I are spending a
weekend at a bed and breakfast..." (76 KB)
"He taugh me how to play the
Sh'nai" "That's even worse than the..." (79 KB)
"...What if I'm taking a
shower and I slip on a bar of soap? Oh my god..." (80 KB)
"Jer getta ferda ratta
ara!" "Homer what is it? Slow down..." (74 KB)
"Marge, we need 5000 cc's of
snacks, stat!" (76 KB)
"Well, everybody has a
fear of something" (18 KB)
"...You can make up for it
somehow" "That's it! Somehow!" (49 KB)
"Some people call me a
space cowboy, yeah..." (227 KB)
"There was a little
Spanish flea..." (31 KB)
"...it's spankin' season
and I got a hankarin' for some spankarin'!" (75 KB)
"I'm going outside...
to stalk... Lenny and Carl... Doh!" (234 KB)
"...in a very sticky
nutty chewey chocolatey, put it away boy!" (88 KB)
"Now I have 4 children.
you will be called... Stitchface." (61 KB)
"Hello Dean, you're a
stupid head" (15 KB)
"Yeah Moe that team sure did
suck last night..." (40 KB)
"You suck-diddly-uck
Flanders!" (5 KB)
"Why all the black?"
"Why all the hair, why all the pearls..." (132 KB)
"First you get the
sugar, then you get the power..." (24KB)
"Super Fun Happy
Slide!" (20 KB)
"Now you're swingin' honey.
Do do do badada BLAP, boo doop bada..." (94 KB)
"Ah, ah, ah, ah, table 5,
table 5..." (35 KB)
"That talking coyote was
really just that talkin' dog" "Hey Homer..." (23 KB)
"Hello is this President
Clinton? Good! I figured if anyone knew..." (73 KB)
"Oh, I always wanted to be
a teamster. So lazy and surly." (70 KB)
"C'mon, gimme the key.
These look like teeth marks!" "I thought..." (51 KB)
"In this house we obey
the laws of thermodynamics!" (7 KB)
"To find Flanders, I just
have to think like Flanders..." (21 KB)
"Now when I say 'Hello Mr.
Thompson' and press down on your foot..." (40 KB)
"We have 3 kids
Homer" "Marge, the dog doesn't count as a kid." (79 KB)
"...We've got a new song
called tighten up, and this is the music..." (126 KB)
"Tramopoline!
Trambapoline!" (7 KB)
"We're gonna lose our house,
and end up living under a bridge..." (37 KB)
"Oh, I want trouble
alright" "Then you're gonna get trouble" (106 KB)
"Look Marge, you don't know
what it's like..." (63 KB)
"Come to Homer's BBBQ, the
extra 'B' is for BYOBB" "WHat's that extra..." (88 KB)
"You can't back out like
when you volunteered for that army..." (84 KB)
"There can only be one
great music festival of all time..." (51 KB)
"...I probably wont even get
into Vassar." "I've had just about..." (103 KB)
"Now, we need code
names, I'll be q-ball..." (24 KB)
"If I'm not a safety
whatchamajigger, I'm nothing" (18 KB)
"War! Huh! Good god yall! What
is it good for!? Absolutely nothin'!" (74 KB)
"Weaseling out of things is
important to learn..." (138 KB)
"How much is this free
resort weekend?" (166 KB)
"I saw weird stuff in
that place last night" (20 KB)
"Would you get off my front
lawn?" "Why don't you make me?" (47 KB)
"Moochin' war widows"
(89 KB)
"Well, if it isn't the
leader of the wiener patrol..." (20 KB)
"WooHoo!" (5 KB)
"A woman is a lot like a
refridgerator. They're about 6 feet tall..." (78 KB)
"Yello?" (4 KB)
"Marge?" "Yes
Homie? Doo doo doo do do doo doo doo do do" (45 KB)
"Yummy yummy yummy I've got
love in my tummy" (123 KB)
Back to top
Jimbo
"I heard that guy's ass
has its own congressman" (37 KB)
"Hey, you're that drunken
posse! Wow. Can I join ya?" (72 KB)
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Kent Brockman
"Would you say its time
for our viewers to crack each others heads.." (122 KB)
"We meet a man who's been
hiccuping for 45 years" (22 KB)
"Petty vandalism is down
80%, while sack beatings are up 900%" (37 KB)
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Krusty
"Hi kids! Welcome to Camp
Krusty!" (43 KB)
"Bart, I need to get
your fingerprints on a candlestick, meet me in..." (97 KB)
"Hey hey!" (8 KB)
"...It's just one line.
Mel's supposed to say it but he's dead..." (74 KB)
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Lionel Hutts
"...she forgot she was
carrying that bottle of delicious bourbon..." (203 KB)
"That's why you're the
judge and I'm the law talkin' guy" (12 KB)
"I watched Matlock in a bar
last night, the sound wasn't on..." (62 KB)
"I move for a bad court
thingy" "You mean a mistrial?" "Yes" (54 KB)
"I've argued in front
of ever judge in the state, often as a lawyer!" (55 KB)
"He's had in for me ever
since I kinda ran over his dog..." (165 KB)
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Lisa
The bit where everyone
says their catch phrases but Lisa (52 KB)
"...yeah, maybe
this means the end of our wacky adventures." (86 KB)
"You don't win friends
with salad" (52 KB)
"Wow, it's like
woodstock, only with advertisements everywhere..." (19 KB)
"A rose by any other name would
smell as sweet" (142 KB)
"I don't need pep pills to be
suspicious..." (143 KB)
"Come gather round
children it's high time ye learned..." (84 KB)
"Lisa, is that too
spicy for you?" "I can see through time!" (50 KB)
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Lunch Lady
Doris
"More testicles mean more
iron" (9 KB)
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Marge
"Can't talk. Keeping
myself in a state of cat-like readiness" (7 KB)
"I was thinking more like
protection for... down there..." (232 KB)
"There's something
about flying a kite at night thats so..." (67 KB)
Marge's "Hrmmm" (8
KB)
"I'm going to sue the pants
off you..." (13 KB)
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Mayor Quimby
"I used the city
treasury to fund the murder of my enemies" (106 KB)
"And let me say, may
the force be with you..." (104 KB)
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Milhouse
"...how come it says
second player score?" "Mom! Bart's swearing!" (99 KB)
"I'm freaking out!!"
(25 KB)
Milhouse's crazy laugh
(164 KB)
"Schools out! Up yours
Crabapple!" (32 KB)
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Misc.
"Abortions for all!"
"Booo!" "Very well, no abortions for anyone!" (61 KB)
"Wait! I need
closure on that anecdote!" (31 KB)
"Well, sure is quiet
today" "Yes, a little too quiet, if you know..." (235 KB)
"...He jury rigged the
door closed with this" "HEy what is that?" (74 KB)
"Captain, Klingons off the
starboard bow" "Again with the Klingons" (22 KB)
"Now let's all get
drunk and play ping-pong!" (10 KB)
"...Hey Homer, you're
hallucinating again." "Not a good sign" (10 KB)
"I do not miss Bart at
all" "I am glad he's gone" "As am I" "B'oh!" (83
KB)
"You call that a
knife? This is a knife!" "Thats not a knife..." (106 KB)
"...Setting course for Rigel
7, I mean home. Heh, Ah... ah." (71 KB)
"Homer, what's the
matter?" "Ain't ya never seen a naked chick..." (82 KB)
"Give her this, and this,
and then these" "Thank you doctor" (175 KB)
"Old gray mare, she
ain't what she used to be" (152 KB)
"No, I
definitely did not. I'm an original creation like Rickey Rouse..." (89 KB)
"Oh here comes that
cannonball guy, he's cool" "Are you being..." (84 KB)
"The cosmic ballet, goes
on" (30 KB)
"How frightfully rude. I
certainly hope someone stabs him in..." (37 KB)
Star Trek 12... so very tired
(35 KB)
"Yoink!" (1 KB)
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Moe
"To Moe from your secret
admirer..." (21 KB)
"A garage, hey fellas
the garage. Well o0-la-di-da Mr. Frenchman..." (80 KB)
"One of you guys has got to be
Homer Sexual" (25 KB)
"Well I'm better than dirt,
well, most kinds of dirt..." (53 KB)
"I'm a stupid moron,
with an ugly face and a big butt, and..." (18 KB)
Moe taking the lie
detector test (67 KB)
"Oh, so you're looking
for a Mr. Smithers, eh? First name waylon?" (50 KB)
"Mr. Moe, prepare to
surface" "You wanna stop callin' me MR. Moe?" (57 KB)
"...And these
ones are smarter than the average bear. They swiped..." (73 KB)
"He is so stupid"
(14 KB)
"You ugly hatefilled
man..." (85 KB)
"Here ya go, here I am,
Uncle Moe, thank ya ma'am..." (94 KB)
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Mr. Burns
"Oh fiddle faddle,
everyone knows our mutants have flippers" (113 KB)
"Excellent... *slurp*"
"next" "Ex-el-ent" "Next" "Exactly... D'oh!"
(71 KB)
"You've won... the...
uh... first annual... award... for outstanding..." (90 KB)
"Bah! To hell with
this!" (11 KB)
"Bart I know you children
see me as some sort of "Booger man"..." (82 KB)
"Hello!" (7 KB)
"Yoink!" (2 KB)
"Well, if it's a crime to love
one's country, then I'm guilty..." (180 KB)
"Yes, you're in deep do'h
now" (9 KB)
"Why it's Fred Flinstone
and his lovely wife Wilma..." (94 KB)
"Ooh, the Germans are mad at
me, I'm so scared!" (182 KB)
"Hello... Smithers. You're
quite good... at turning me on." (55 KB)
"Well, that's leprocy for
you" (12 KB)
"I'm going to get your
Lucky Charms" "Oh no. My brains" (102 KB)
"Pish posh!" (7
KB)
"It's company policy to give
you the plague" (14 KB)
"ladies and gentlemen, the
Ramones" (97 KB)
"Smiters, I've designed
a new plane. I call it the Spruce Moose" (147 KB)
"To the plant, we'll
take the Spruce Moose!" (74 KB)
"I think I'll donate a
million dollars to the local orphanage..." (38 KB)
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Ned Flanders
"Hey Homey, I can see your
doodle" (5 KB)
"Here's Jose Flanders, and
here's Lord Thislewick Flanders" (77 KB)
"Hidely-hey!" (8
KB)
"Well, howdely-doodly-do.
*Click* Hello? Hello-diddle-odely?" (18 KB)
"Say your prayers
Simpson... Because the schools can't force you..." (78 KB)
"Toodely-doo!"
(7 KB)
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Nelson
"Haha!" (14 KB)
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Principal skinner
"Yes, I should be
go... good lord what is happening in there?!" (12 KB)
"I never thought I'd say
this, but the no-good-nicks rule..." (52 KB)
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Professor Frink
"It should be obvious
to even the most dimwitted individual..." (27 KB)
"Mmm-hey" (7 KB)
"Well sure the Frinkiac 7
looks impressive, DON'T TOUCH IT..." (39 KB)
"Which is a concept so
ridiculous, it makes me wanna laugh out..." (26 KB)
"Professor Frink,
professor Frink, he likes to laugh he likes to think..." (78 KB)
"I have created a lemon
ball so sour, it can only be contained in..." (76 KB)
"Good morning ma'am, good
afternoon sir..." (64 KB)
"Well as you can see, when
the burlar trips the alarm, the house..." (193 KB)
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Rainier wolfcastle
"Maybe you all are
homosexuals too" (96 KB)
"My eyes! The goggles do
nothing!" (123 KB)
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Ralph
"When I grow up, I'm
going to Bovine University" (8 KB)
"Why must you turn my
office into a house of lies?" (75 KB)
"Me fail English? That's
unpossible" (32 KB)
"I wouldn't have so many
nose bleeds if i kept my finger outta there" (12 KB)
"It's a spearhead!"
"Thats your trowel blade, it fell off the handle" (137 KB)
"Will you cook my dinner
for me? My parents aren't around..." (15 KB)
"I'm Idaho!" (3
KB)
"Oh boy, sleep! That's
where I'm a Viking!" (14 KB)
"My worm went in my mouth
and then I ate it..." (16 KB)
"And when the doctor said
I didn't have worms anymore..." (16 KB)
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Scorpio
"What's your
dream?" "Uh, to work for you?" "Don't do that..." (69 KB)
"These gentlemen will be
your eyes and your ears..." (13 KB)
"What's your least
favorite country? Italy or France?" "France" (61 KB)
Scorpio's Theme Song (225
KB)
"you have any sugar
around here?" "Sugar? Sure. Sorry it's not in..." (97 KB)
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Sideshow Bob
"No children have ever
meddled with the Republican Party..." (11 KB)
"This dank, urine
soaked, hell hole..." (24 KB)
Back to top
Snake
"oh no, Bette
Midler!" (7 KB)
"Uh, wallet
inspector..." (79 KB)
Back to top
Songs
The end theme in the
style of the Addams Family (112 KB)
The end theme in an
Afro-Cuban style (112 KB)
the "Amendment To
Be" song (209 KB)
The Simpsons singing the
"Armour Hot Dog" jingle (67 KB)
The end theme in an
Austrailian style (123 KB)
Cops, in Springfield (160 KB)
The end theme in a
big band Vegas style (124 KB)
The Burlesque House song
(301 KB)
The end theme in the style
of Dragnet (157 KB)
The original end theme (108
KB)
The theme to Eye On
Springfield (108 kb)
The garbage man song (454
KB)
The Halloween
Special V beginning (193 KB)
The end theme in
the style of Hill Street BLues (107 KB)
THe Itchy and Scratchy
theme (Love and share version) (27 KB)
The Itchy and Scratchy
theme (122 KB)
The end theme in the
style of It's A Mad World (111 KB)
THe end theme in the style of
the JFK assassination (125 KB)
The Kwik-E-Mart song (137
KB)
The Ned Flanders song (26
KB)
The Simpsons opening theme
(368 KB)
The end theme in a
renaissance style (122 KB)
The shorter opening theme
(621 KB)
The theme song to Skinner's
spin off show (81 KB)
The Softball song (New
better bigger version) (1.7 MB)
The "Those Were the
Days" Song (144 KB)
The stone cutters song
(472 KB)
Homer's 'under the sea' song
(120 KB)
Back to top
Troy McClure
"You might remember
me from such drivers ed films as..." (25 KB)
"You may remember me
from suck Fox network specials as..." (24 KB)
"You might remember me
from such show business funerals as..." (39 KB)
"As wacky as those kids
were, they were no match for captain wacky" (60 KB)
"You may remember me from
such films as The Erotic..." (207 KB)
"You may remember me
from such cartoons as Christmas Ape" (19 KB)
"If a cow ever got the
chance, he'd eat you..." (13 KB)
"You might remember me from
such films as The Boat Jacking of..." (103 KB)
"You may remember me
from such public service announcements..." (23 KB)
"You may remember me from
such medical films as Alice Doesn't..." (154 KB)
"You may remember me from
such nature films as Earwigs: Eww!..." (76 KB)
"You may remember me from
such telethons as Out With Gout '88,..." (18 KB)
The entire "Stop The
Planet of the Apes: I Want To Get Off" musical (458 KB)
"You may remember me from
such films as The Revenge of Abe..." (16 KB)
"You may remember me from
such self-help videos as Smoke..." (17 KB)
"You may remember me
from such films as The Greatest Story..." (17 KB)
"I'll leave you with what
we all came here to see..." (90 KB)
Back to top
Willy
"Bonjour, you cheese
eatin' monkies!" (10 KB)
"Willy, remove all the
colored chalk from the classrooms..." (24 KB)
"Ahhh! Make way for
Willy!" (17 KB)
"I'm a maniac, maniac thats
for sure..." (60 KB)
"Give me that, you noodle
armed choir boy!" (21 KB)
"You used me Skinner! You
used me!!" (39 KB)
"If I don't save the wee
turtles, who will?" (27 KB)
"When you can always
go, downtown" (65 KB)
"Lunch Lady Doris, have
you got any grease?" (18 KB)
"There's nary an animal
alive that can outrun a greased Scotsman" (34 KB)
"I'll kill that Mr. Burns,
and, uh, wound that Mr. Smithers" (22 KB)
"If elected mayor, my
first act will be to kill the whole lot of ya..." (17 KB)
"My god man, I've watered
it down as far as she'll go..." (21 KB)
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